The Smell of Loneliness

What would the smell of loneliness be?

Is it the mere absence of another body odor that could mingle with yours?

The smell of freshly made soup, but no one to share it with?

Or the smell of Aïki noodles at 9 p.m., because you can't bring yourself to cook a proper dinner for yourself alone?

Would it be the scented candles you could buy for yourself without first discussing it with someone else - who would have to sit in the same scent?

The smell of emptiness?

What does that smell like?

Maybe it's the smell of barbecue, perceived from your place, knowing there's no seat saved for you.

Can you put it into words or is it something you have to experience yourself?

What would the sound of loneliness sound like?

Is it the lack of cozy, homely sounds around you?

Or is it the intrusiveness of ambient sounds that actually belong in the background but take up more space due to a lack of competition?

The ticking of the second hand on that old clock at your place.

The creaking of planks settling.

The wind rustling through the leaves.

Or is it rather the sound of cars rushing by on the highway?

I often hear that silence can be deafening, so could it be those things?

My grandmother told me that after Grandpa died, she left her television on for days so she could hear people talking.

Is loneliness realizing that no one is talking to you?

What does loneliness taste like?

Is it bitter, do you think?

Or can it be sweet at times?

Is it a bitter pill you have to swallow, and what awaits you on the other side?

I spontaneously think of swimming in the sea.

Underestimating the waves and swallowing liters of salt water.

How unpleasant that experience is.

How you are completely overwhelmed, out of breath.

Left with a nasty taste in your mouth.

Gasping for air.

Is that the taste of loneliness?

What does loneliness look like?

Does it have moist edges around the eyes?

A red nose from the sadness that is looking for a way out?

A vein on the forehead from suppressed anger?

Does it have cold hands?

Does it hang its head?

Does it always lean forward slightly,

despondency visible in the shoulders?

Does it have well-groomed hair, or knots from neglected self-care, roots growing out, or split ends?

Grayish, dull skin?

Bags under the eyes?

What about the loneliness you feel in someone's company?

Because doesn't that cut the deepest?

How you realize that your vision, ideals, and goals are not shared by the other person.

What about being alone, but not lonely at all?

How would that smell, sound, taste, look?

Is it more colorful, more versatile?

Rocking to the rhythm of the song?

How temporary is loneliness?

How often does that second hand echo?

How many minutes of television remain unwatched,

just to chase away the evil spirits?

Does loneliness come in convulsions,

accompanied by phantom pains?

Can you only be lonely if you have known togetherness?

How do you explain it to someone who doesn't feel it creeping in so deeply?

Who doesn't feel it gnawing away at the most unexpected times?

Is that perhaps the key, you wonder.

Do you chase it away by giving it a name?

Do you defeat it by disarming it?

Like Rumpelstiltskin.